


Oblivious

by Nikky_the_writer



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-11
Updated: 2018-12-06
Packaged: 2019-09-12 10:46:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16871521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nikky_the_writer/pseuds/Nikky_the_writer
Summary: Bucky and Reader are best friends, they live together. Reader is totally oblivious that Bucky is in love with her - AUWarnings: cursing, mentions of sex





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally posted on my Tumblr: @nikky-the-writter

It was dark outside when you came home. Stepping into the apartment you noticed the light coming from Bucky’s room. You curiously step inside and saw Bucky sitting on the bed watching TV. You jumped on his bed and lie on his pillow looking at his face. He came closer to you.

˝Do I even have to ask you about your date?” he smiled. Trying to keep himself collected in front of you.

˝It was really great. I have never thought that I could find a guy like him,” you were still amazed by a guy that Wanda set you up, he had an accent, blue eyes and he was intelligent.

˝What do you mean?” Bucky moved from you sitting up.

˝Well he is so smart and intelligent and his voice, I just want to put him in my purse so I could carry him everywhere with me,” you followed Bucky’s actions doing the same. ˝We were talking for hours and it felt like we have known each other for years, he is really easy-going, not like you,” you were teasing Bucky, not really understanding why is he behaving so strange.

˝Not like me, what the fuck (Y/N/N)?” Bucky was on the edge because of you, he never showed you this side of him. He would be angry sometimes, but never like this. It really bothers you; you cared about him deeply and seeing him this stressed out was making you angry.

˝What’s wrong, Buck? Talk to me,” you stroked his arm, looking at his lowered head. With your index fingers, you pulled his head up, so that you could see his blue eyes. His eyes weren’t as clear and happy as they were in the morning.

˝It’s nothing (Y/N), something happened at work, nothing else. ˝

˝Why didn’t you say something. It had to be something bad because I have never seen you like this.˝

˝Everything will be fine, don’t worry, please, promise me,” he whispered.

˝Yes of course, Buck, I promise, but please don’t hide anything from me,” you hugged him and you stayed like that for a minute. You wanted to leave when you heard his voice.

˝Can you stay?”

You turned around and then he continued.

˝I just don’t want to be alone right now.”

Without any word you laid back on his bed, he put his head on your chest and you hugged him to let him know that he will always have you.

* * *

You and Bucky met when you were in high school.

 

_One day you were late for your history class and hurrying through the halls you heard music coming from one of the classrooms. You couldn’t just walk past so, you opened the door, quietly and you saw a brown haired boy playing piano, you could recognize him, you saw him few times, you had a little crush on him. The melody was so calming and beautiful that you didn’t even notice when it stopped playing._  
˝What are you doing here?”  
You didn’t know what he said so you were just staring at him like an idiot.  
Seeing him that he was still waiting for you to say something. ˝What?” you asked.  
He looked at you with sparkles in his eyes, ˝You are Stark’s daughter˝.  
You were going to private school, you didn’t want to, but your dad insisted and everyone knew who you were. ˝So, what?” you hate when somebody would mention your father. Sometimes it felt like you don’t even exist, only your father, Tony Stark the billionaire.  
˝Nothing, I just … I’m Bucky,” he said shyly, coming closer to you and shaking your hand.  
˝I’m (Y/N).˝  
˝Do you want me to show you something cool?˝  
˝Sorry, I have class, I’m already late.˝  
˝I promise you that it’s worth it,” he didn’t know where he was going with it, but he liked you. Thought that you are awesome, he heard you when you would outsmart your professors and heard you sing, he was like a watcher from the shadow, not a stalker, just a boy who couldn’t get the courage to talk to you. Finally, he did and you were glad, so, you didn’t want to miss anything so you followed him.   
He brought you to the theatre in your school. You looked around and didn’t know why you were there.  
˝Stand in the center,” he said, leaving your side.  
˝Are you going to kill me? I have that kind of feeling right now,” you asked and then soon after the lights went out. ˝Now I’m sure that this is the end. Who is going to take care of my father now? ˝  
˝Isn’t he old enough to take care of himself?˝ he scared you standing beside you in the dark.  
˝He is a big baby, don’t let him fool you,” you said, despite you were standing there with him alone.  
˝Look up,” he said, and you looked up. You were amazed there were a thousand shining stars on the ceiling you couldn’t believe how you never find out about that before. At that moment you were amazed by Bucky, who became your rock and your best friend.


	2. Chapter 2

You lazily opened your eyes. Your body was stiff, ‘cause of Bucky’s weight on you.

His head was on your chest and both of his hands were on your side, it was a nice feeling; comfortable. You observed him for a few minutes stroking his hair with your hands. He sighed contentedly and you smiled.

“Hey, Buck I can’t breathe.”

“Don’t lie, Y/N/N.”

“I’m not lying.”

“Oh, please stop it,” he rolled off you and he watched you leave, wanting to run to you and never let you go, but he couldn’t. He swore to himself that he will never make a move on you. The friendship that you two had was the most important thing that he had in his life and he wasn’t willing to let it break. Even if he had to see you with somebody else, at least he thought so.

 

You went to your bedroom to take a shower. Then you put your favorite shirt, the one that you took from Bucky and your shorts.

You started making pancakes when you heard that Bucky was coming.

“Morning,” he said, his voice was still raspy.

“Did you sleep well?” you placed the plates on the counter.

“Yes, I had the most amazing pillow ever,”  his grin brought a smile to your lips.

“You?”

“Not really because there was a human being sleeping on me the whole night, I think that he had 1000 pounds.”

“For the record, I don’t weight that much,” he pouted.

“Are you sure because you look a little bit…”

“Excuse me; I don’t want you to finish that sentence.”

Your little conversation was interrupted by your vibrating phone. You got a new message from Ian, the man that you went on a date yesterday. You were giggling and Bucky’s smile turned into a grin.

“Who?” Bucky simply asked.

“Ian, you know the guy from yesterday.”

“Yeah, I know,” he said angrily.

“What’s going on with you?”

“Nothing, just work I told you,” he shrugged.

“You are laying Buck. You work for my father if there was something wrong, he would tell me.”

“I didn’t lie.”

“We are friends for years you think that I don’t know you?”

“You don’t,” Bucky mumble under his breath as he was getting angrier with every passing second.  

“I do.”

“If you really knew me, you would know that I fell in love with you the first time when I saw you,” he yelled, frustrated.

“What?” you asked thinking that you didn’t hear him correctly.

“Nothing,” he said and headed to the door.

“Bucky?!” you yelled after him, but he was already gone.

 

* * *

You stayed home, you tried to call him, but he didn’t answer. You called your father that you will not come to work today. You were a writer, but you also worked for your father because he asked you to.  
An hour passed and you were still sitting at the counter, you haven’t even touched your pancakes. Your brain hurt trying to figure out how you didn’t notice. You did notice, but your mind didn’t want you to believe in it. After thinking, you decided that you will keep waiting for him. You sat on the couch and you watched Netflix. The thought that you should call Ian was flying around your mind. In the moment of weakness when your pizza delivery came, you called Ian and you told him that you can’t go out with him again. You weren’t sure what will you tell Bucky, but at least you had to give him some time to adjust to your future decision which you didn’t even know what it will be.  
Hours passed by, he didn’t come. You were waiting for him from the morning, even your dad called knowing that something was wrong. You told him, and he started swearing in your phone telling you that Bucky was an idiot and that he obviously has no balls because he didn’t say anything before. It was 2 am when you heard a noise from your door.

You got up and you were looking at drunken Bucky who couldn’t even stand on his feet. So you thought to yourself that maybe that’s the reason that blond woman was at his side.

˝What are you doing? ˝ Bucky was avoiding your eyes and your question.

˝Is she your girlfriend? ˝ the blond asked.

˝No and I don’t really think that you will become his,” you said coldly. You wanted to punch Bucky in the face, first, he told you that he is in love with you and then he comes home with some random woman so that he could fuck her.

˝What’s wrong with you Y/N/N? You don’t have to be rude?˝

˝You don’t have to be a dick, but here you are,” you said with contempt in your voice and walked past them into your room.

 

* * *

You tried to sleep, but the walls in your room were thin, so you could hear almost everything. You couldn’t sleep so you tried to make yourself laugh. Whenever you would hear them saying something, you would say something back, knowing that they could hear you. It was fun for the first ten minutes you said something like ˝Bucky, why is it so small˝, or ˝Oh God, I can’t look at that thing anymore,˝ and something like ˝No, babe, it looks that way because I was in surgery to make it bigger, but the surgery went wrong.˝

Bucky yelled at you a couple of times, so you put your headphones on and you turn on your laptop to write.

You checked your phone and saw that you had missed calls from your father. He was getting married next weekend and he wanted you to go with him and Pepper to France in two days. You said that you were busy, but the truth was that you didn’t want to leave Bucky. He had nightmares often and you wanted to be there for him.

˝Hey, did I wake you? ˝ you asked your father over the phone.

˝Really sweety? ˝

˝Yeah, sorry you never sleep. ˝

˝I can’t leave my work unfinished.˝

˝You should be with Pepper, you should really spend more time with her. ˝

˝I know, but I just…” he started.

˝Don’t dad, you have to realize that she is not like me; she won’t stay when you mess up. Also, she won’t spend days and nights working with you. ˝

˝I have a feeling that you are telling me that because you lost someone. What had he done Y/N/N? ˝

˝Well, I don’t want to talk about it, it’s kind of a long story,” you wanted to avoid the subject, but whom were you kidding your father always finds out everything.

˝Than skip to the end.˝

˝He is fucking someone at the moment, I mean they are not still over; I could call you when they finish. They started like fifteen minutes ago, so I think they need a few more minutes. You know how it goes with- ˝

˝You can stop I understand, he is an imbecile and I will punch him in the face when I see him,” he assured you, he even mentions that he could fire him.

˝Dad just promise me that after this call you will go to bed with Pepper˝

˝Promise me that you will leave with us on Saturday.˝

˝I promise,” you said.

˝I promise, sleep well Y/N˝

 


	3. Chapter 3

You were woken up by your alarm at 5 am. You wanted to leave the apartment before he wakes up. After taking a shower and washing your teeth, you got dressed. Your stomach hurts, you were really hungry, so you quietly like a mouse, took your bag and laptop walking into the kitchen.

You placed your stuff on the counter and you looked for your leftover pizza from yesterday. Fortunately, you found one slice. You ate it quickly like somebody was in front of you with a gun. You heard something in Bucky’s room. You grabbed your stuff and you run to the door, grabbing your boots, you didn’t even lock the door behind you. Stairs were cold against your feet. Coming to the lobby you put your boots on looking like a madwoman still holding a piece of pizza in your mouth. You even forgot how to chew when you heard the noise. After fixing your hair you headed to your father’s company.

* * *

Bucky woke up hearing something in the kitchen his head hurt and he couldn’t remember anything from after he told you how he feels. Suddenly he forgot about the noise when he felt another body behind him. A warm hand was holding him tight and he smiled slightly. He didn’t want to turn around; he wanted to enjoy the moment. But then it comes to him it couldn’t be you. He left after saying what he felt. His heart sank thinking what an idiot he was. He quietly moved away from the woman, while getting up, he accidentally kicked his lamp on the floor. Hopefully, she didn’t wake up. Bucky was in his boxers and he left his room disgusted with himself. He didn’t want yesterday to go as it went. He saw a plate on the counter and that one pair of your boots wasn’t next to the door, so he knew that you already left. He wanted to take a shower, but he didn’t want to face the woman that was in his bed, so he sat in his boxers on the couch. After half an hour, he heard doors from his bedroom and then from the front door. It meant that a woman with whom he slept was gone. He didn’t have any energy left to get up after having the battle inside his mind. He knew that you wouldn’t answer if he called, so he was left with only one option.

* * *

˝Miss. Stark, what are you doing here so early? ˝ Happy asked, coming into your father’s office. You were sitting at his table with your feet on the glass desk and your laptop on your legs. You had your office, but your father’s had a better view especially at sunrise.   
˝Morning Happy, I didn’t want to be at home, so I came here. It’s not that early, I mean its 6 am. That surprises me, you know? ˝ you put your legs on the ground and close the laptop.   
˝What do you mean? ˝ he sat down in front of you.  
˝It’s 6 am and my father is nowhere to be found. ˝  
Happy let a quiet chuckle.  
˝What do you know H?˝  
˝That’s why I’m here. Your father called and said that he will be here around 9. ˝  
˝Did he has a meeting or something? ˝  
˝No, he said that he is going to stay at home a little longer˝  
You were glad that he kept his promise, you didn’t doubt him, but you were really wondering if he would be able to stay the whole night in bed. You relaxed in the chair listening what Happy was saying, but your eyes were slowly closing. Last night wasn’t really great you were tossing and turning in your bed trying to think why Bucky was acting like an asshole.

 

* * *

Bucky called your father convincing him after twenty minutes of fighting over the phone to meet him at Bucky’s office to talk. Bucky came first it was around half past seven.   
˝Talk! ˝ Tony ordered walking in.  
˝I want her to know that I’m sorry,” Bucky was sitting with his head in his hands  
˝You can tell her that on your own. ˝  
˝She won’t listen. I know her when she gets mad at someone she avoids them,” he looked at Tony.  
˝That sounds like my daughter. Why did you do it? ˝ Tony has been always overprotective over you, but he liked Bucky. He always thought that you and Bucky will end up together.  
˝Why did I tell her? ˝ Bucky asked confused.  
˝No, Barnes why did you sleep with another woman? Couldn’t you keep it in your pants or something? ˝  
˝I got drunk,” Bucky looked ashamed.  
˝Don’t blame drinks for your actions. People tend to do what they really want when they are drunk. So why did you sleep with her? ˝  
˝I didn’t want to, but I know that Y/N… ˝ he stopped talking and looked to the floor.  
˝You slept with another woman because you thought that my daughter won’t sleep with you? ˝  
˝No, I just… I don’t know,” Bucky looked at Tony with his watery eyes, he really messed up.  
˝Damn right, you don’t know. Do you really think that after everything you have done that I will put a good word for you? ˝ Tony was pacing around Bucky’s office.   
˝I didn’t want… ˝  
˝I should fire you! ˝ Tony yelled.  
˝You should, I’m really sorry˝  
˝But I won’t, she loves you and she would never forgive me if I did that,” he lowered his voice knowing what Bucky means to you.  
˝I know.˝  
˝You look disappointed.˝  
˝She doesn’t love me like… ˝  
˝Like a lover? That’s what you thought? ˝ Tony quickly asked.  
˝Yes.˝

˝I think that you are wrong Barnes and that’s why I’m telling you to fix the mess you made. I will kill you if you hurt her again. Trust me, I will. ˝

 

 

* * *

˝Miss. Stark? ˝ Happy’s voice brought you back.  
˝Yup, yeah… I’m here,” you struggled to sit straight almost falling to the floor.  
˝So, where were we? ˝ you asked seriously.  
˝You asked me to inform you when Mr. Barnes comes here,” you nodded, not understanding why he was telling you that now.  
˝Well, he is here.˝  
Your eyes were now wide open looking at Happy like crazy.  
˝But… but he comes around 8, that’s like,” you stopped looking around for a clock. ˝Oh shit, I fall asleep, great. Sorry H, please just do what I asked you to.˝  
˝No worries and your father was here twenty minutes ago. He wants you to come to the lab to help him with something. ˝  
˝Thanks,” you got up, leaving your stuff in his office.

* * *

You walked into the empty lab where only your father was with two cups of coffee.  
˝Oh, look how time flies. It’s already 9 am,” you mocked your father.  
˝Funny Y/N/N, that’s really funny.˝   
You took one of the cups and took a sip of warm liquid. ˝So, why am I here? ˝   
˝Take a chair,” your father waited for you to take a seat and then he continued.  
˝Y/N why didn’t you talk to him? ˝  
˝When? ˝  
˝Before,” your father simply said.  
˝Before coming here? ˝  
˝Why didn’t you? , he asked, taking your hand in his. ˝I know how much he means to you? ˝  
˝I’m not sure if I have the right to be mad at him. ˝  
˝What do you mean? ˝ he raised his eyebrow.  
˝I think that I already knew that he had feelings for me. I wasn’t sure, but sometimes I would catch him staring for too long. I didn’t really know, but when he said it like everything finally had sense. ˝  
˝Why do you think that you don’t have the reason to be mad? He didn’t even give you the chance to tell him how you feel. ˝  
˝He wouldn’t have anything to hear,” you whispered.  
˝Don’t you love him? ˝  
˝I do˝  
˝Y/N/N, you know what I mean,” he smiled slightly waiting for your answer. He knew what you felt for Bucky. He saw you two make eye contact every time you would see each other and those long hugs.  
˝I don’t know, I think if he had stayed yesterday that our friendship would be over. ˝  
˝You don’t mean that. ˝  
˝When you are trying to convince yourself that you don’t have feelings for your best friend for years, it becomes the truth,” you said pulling your hand from your father and leaving the lab.


	4. Chapter 4

˝Miss. Stark,” you heard voices behind you.  
˝Yes,” you stopped walking and turned around to see Maria Hill standing a few steps away from you.   
You smiled and waited for her to continue.

 

˝Miss. Romanoff is looking for you. What should I say to her where to find you?˝  
˝I will let her… ˝ you searched for your phone in your pockets, but you couldn’t find it.  
˝I left my phone somewhere, just tell her that I….. Oh shit,” you saw Bucky walking out of his office.  
˝I have to… ˝ you started talking, but you stopped when you saw him turning around. You ran away from Maria.  
You wanted to go to your office, but he would probably look for you there, so you went to your father’s office. The office was empty; you sat under the table with your laptop so that nobody could see you because of glass walls.   
You heard somebody walking in and you were hoping that it was your father. After a few seconds, somebody sat next to you.  
˝So, from whom are we hiding here? ˝ asked Natasha.  
˝Nobody,” you kept writing, but then Nat closed your laptop and put it on the floor next to her.  
˝Yeah and nobody’s name is Bucky,” she lowered her head to look at you. She started saying something, but then you both heard the door opening. You quickly put your palm on her mouth and the other on your mouth to be sure nobody hears you. You looked at the space where Nat was sitting under the table and you saw that it was a man. You knew that it wasn’t your father. He would never wear that kind of pants with running shoes. You smiled and moved a little from Nat, you pulled his pants a little.   
The men felt something tugging on his pants so he looked down. He crawled under the table to look at you and Nat.  
˝I’m hoping that we are not going to eat here. My food won’t fit in,” Pietro said with his thick accent.  
˝You are getting fat Piet,” you heard Nat saying.  
˝Nat you stole the words from my mouth. ˝  
Pietro looked at you both with his mouth open. ˝I hate you both, you are… ˝ door opened and you quickly crawl to Pietro and you put your palm to cover his mouth.  
You saw somebody standing in heels in front the desk and a second later Wanda was crawling under the table.  
˝This is not normal. I mean, did somebody invite you all here? ˝ you asked before going back to your place in front Pietro. Four of you continued sitting under the table. The silence was broken when Wanda asked. ˝Do you guys understand how hard is to sit here in this skirt? Why can’t we hide somewhere else from Bucky? ˝  
˝We are not hiding from him,” you said almost screaming.  
˝Babe, we all know,” Pietro said.  
˝How? ˝ you asked. You couldn’t understand how three of them always knew everything.  
˝I talk to Tony when you left. I don’t understand why you are so surprised. We are your friends and we love you. We are always going to know everything,” Wanda said, starting to get up.  
˝Where are you going? ˝  
˝Taking you all out to have lunch, don’t protest Y/N.˝  
˝Pizza? ˝ you asked and she smiled. You were all heading to the elevator when you heard your name.  
˝I’ll meet you there,” you said to Nat, Wanda and Pietro. You waited for their elevator to close its doors and then you turned around. There he was standing in front of you. The man you have known for so long, but now you just wanted to hide from him. He asked you something, but you weren’t listening, so he repeated.  
˝Can we talk in my office? ˝ he asked and you nodded.

 

He was dressed in black suit pants and a black button-up shirt. His hair was messy, not styled like he usually had and he didn’t wear his tie, so you assumed that he was dressed in a hurry.  
You came into his office and you sat at his table, as you would usually do.   
˝So, what’s the problem? ˝ you asked faking a smile.   
˝I wanted to talk to you about last night when I… ˝  
˝No need really. It’s fine. ˝  
˝What’s fine? ˝ he asked.  
˝You know… everything you said and that blonde. ˝  
˝Don’t you feel the same, wouldn’t you do the same at one point in the future?˝  
˝Fuck a blond? Well, I could your friend, Steve seems nice…˝  
You put your legs on his table, you would usually be shy in this kind of conversation, but you were angry. You weren’t sure what you were feeling towards him, so you tried to play it cool.  
˝Y/N, you don’t have the same feelings towards me? Don’t you love me? ˝  
Bucky thought to himself that somehow your father was wrong. What if he had ruined your friendship forever by saying that he’s in love with you?  
˝Look, Buck I understand that at some point in every friendship like ours, somebody starts liking their friend a little bit more than they should. I can tell you that that kind of crushes goes away, I’ve been there and now you are. You just need some time. If it was something deeper you would never bring a girl into the room that is next to me. I never did that to you,” words were flying out from your mouth you couldn’t stop yourself and you didn’t want it. It was better for you two to stay just friends, and then you will never lose him.  
˝So, you don’t, right now? Why were you than yelling from your room? ˝  
˝Sweetie,” you raised your voice a little and said ˝I just told you. You brought that woman into our apartment not informing me before. I just got angry nothing more. I usually stay at the guy’s place you should do that too. ˝  
˝But Tony… ˝ he stopped himself and now you were interested in what did your father say  
˝What? ˝  
He didn’t say anything he sat on the chair in front of you looking at the ground.  
˝I’m leaving on Saturday,” you broke the silence; he looked at you for a slight moment.  
˝Where? ˝  
˝To France, I know that you will come to the wedding, but I think that I will stay there for a couple of months.˝  
˝Where did that come from? ˝  
˝I just need some time to think about everything that is happening˝  
˝Because of me? ˝ he whispered.  
˝Bucky you are not the most important person in my life,” you put your legs down. He looked at you with sadness in his eyes. ˝I’m not leaving because of you, my father is getting married, and I know that I’m not a child anymore, but it still gets to me! ˝  
˝Yeah,” he just shrugged with his shoulders. You were ready to leave standing at the door. You were fighting with yourself to not say anything else, but you did anyway. Why would he have the right to confess his feelings because of the small crush, when you kept your mouth shut for years?  
˝You know what, maybe I am leaving because of you, because of the stupidity you said and everything you’ve done. We’ve been friends for so long and you decided to throw it away. So congratulations Bucky you destroy one of the longest friendship in your life. Maybe I should stay there forever,” while you were walking away you could swear that you heard his heart cracking, or just maybe…. it was yours?


	5. Chapter 5

_˝Hey, give me that back! ˝, you run after Bucky who took your phone.  
˝Nope,” he ran into his room looking at whom you were texting. He locked his door and started reading your texts._

_˝Come on, Buck don’t be an ass,” after a few minutes of waiting in front his room he opened the door._  
˝Pietro? ˝  
 You looked at his face, you couldn’t read his facial expressions, but then you saw a smirk on his face. You quickly said. ˝He is a friend˝  
˝A friend? I don’t believe you and the texts say otherwise. Oh God, you are sleeping with Pietro Maximoff? You are not normal. ˝  
˝We are just friends like you and me,” you shrug with your shoulders and sat on his bed.  
˝No you’re not. We don’t talk like that and he doesn’t have any female friends, only those that he fucks.˝  
You were mad at Bucky that he read your text, but slightly hoping that they would make him jealous. That he will finally say that he likes you more than a friend, but he didn’t and months went by without you noticing. You still kept on texting with Pietro; you even started to like him. You were trying to forget about your feelings towards Bucky; you wanted to bury them in the darkest place that you could find.  
You started dating Pietro short after Bucky read your text. He liked you and you liked him, but not more than you liked Bucky. Pietro was nice, he did flirt a lot, but he didn’t sleep with every woman that he knew, he was a really nice guy.  
After one of your dates you asked Pietro to come to your apartment, Bucky told you that he will be working late so you saw your opportunity. When Pietro closed the door of your apartment you kissed him. He pressed your body next to the wall and started kissing your neck. You moaned in pleasure, while his lips went lower to your collarbone. He put his arm on your hips and pressed his body on you. You were really enjoying and you didn’t want him to stop. He carried you to your room with your legs around his waist.  
He gently laid you down on your bed and then he stopped. His kisses were gone, his hands were gone, you were afraid of opening your eyes, but you did anyway.  
˝Why did you stop? ˝ Pietro was sitting on your bed looking at you, a sad smile was forming on his lips.  
˝I’m not Bucky,” after you heard those words you realized your mistake. It wasn’t his name that you said in pleasure it was Bucky’s.  
˝I’m so sorry.˝  
˝Y/N, please stop. It’s not your fault, Wanda told me not to let you in my heart, but I couldn’t resist. I think that I always knew that you won’t be mine. ˝  
˝You knew about Bucky? ˝  
˝I wasn’t sure, but I realized the first time when I was in the same room with you two,” he took your hand in his and kissed your cheek.  
˝I could stay if you want, I mean as a friend.˝  
You wanted to say yes, but then his phone vibrated.  
˝It’s Wanda,” he said, and answered the phone. He quickly ended the conversation. ˝I’m really sorry, but I have to take Wanda home. ˝  
˝Is she all right? ˝  
˝Yes, you could say that. She just drank more than she can handle.˝  
˝Will I see you tomorrow? ˝ you asked, walking him to your front door.  
˝Don’t worry babe, I’ll call you in the morning. I don’t know if I will have to babysit my sister. Her hangovers can last pretty long,” he kissed your cheek and smiled at you.  
˝Bye…˝

 

* * *

 

_It was quiet when Bucky came home. He thought that you’ll still be up to tell him about your date with Pietro. He started hating him, it wasn’t that he hated Pietro; he hated every man that looked at you._  
Passing your door, he heard sniffles. He quickly changed his suit into something more comfortable, avoiding your room. He wanted to come in, but he thought that he would break if he sees you cry and that he will tell you how he feels just to see you smile. And so he did. He opened the door, seeing you buried under the covers with a few blankets on your body.  
˝Are you okay? ˝ he quietly asked. He hasn’t heard a response so he sat on your bed next to your head. You looked up and quickly covered your head with your blanket.  
˝What has he done? ˝  
˝Nothing, it’s just… ˝  
˝What? ˝  
You pulled your covers a little so that he could lie down next to you and he did. He held you in his arms.  
˝Hey, Y/N/N what happened? ˝  
˝We decided that we should be just friends.”  
 He barely heard you, your head was under the covers and you didn’t want to move it. ˝Did he… ˝  
˝No, I…it was because of me. ˝ You moved closer to his body, putting your arms around his torso and finally releasing the blanket from your grip.  
When you put your head on his chest, he slowly moved the blanket from your face.  
˝I can tell you that Pietro wasn’t the right for you. ˝  
˝Nobody is,” you exhale.  
˝Don’t be stupid. I can tell you that there is someone waiting for you. ˝  
˝Yeah right, what the hell is he waiting for? ˝ quickly after your words left your mouth your heart beats were slower and you were dreaming.  
After some time when he was sure that you were sleeping, Bucky started speaking while gently making random patterns on your skin with his index fingers.  
˝I don’t know Y/N/N, he is maybe just an idiot,” he took a deep breath and continued. ˝I wish that I could tell you what I feel, but I don’t want to lose you. I don’t deal well with losses. If I didn’t have you and Steve after my parents died and after the accident, I think that I wouldn’t be here. I love you so much and I tell you that every day. You think that I’m telling you that I love you like a friend, but I never did in just that way and you will never find out what I really feel.˝

 

* * *

You couldn’t stop the tears falling from your eyes remembering everything you been through with him, you were looking outside the window at the clouds that were so close to you.  
˝Y/N, are you okay? ˝ Pietro asked, sitting next to you on the airplane. You looked at him with a sad smile.  
˝No,” you whispered.

He removed your tears with his thumb and hugged you. You were hugging for a long time and you didn’t want to let go because you have already let go of somebody else and it hurt like somebody shot you in the heart. And then you cried more because you were the one that pulled the trigger.

 


	6. Chapter 6

Bucky was laying on the couch at his friend’s place. He stayed there from the day you left for France; he couldn’t go back to the apartment. He didn’t want to know if you really left and that you won’t come back to the apartment you two shared. He was taking a sip of his beer when he heard Steve approaching.  
˝Are you seriously going to do this every day? ˝

˝Don’t worry, I’ll find another place soon,” Bucky put his bottle on the glass table and looked at Steve.  
˝I don’t want you to find a new place, I want you to talk to Y/N. ˝  
˝What should I say to her? It’s not like she is going to take me back as a friend or anything else,” he got up and headed for the door.  
˝Maybe you should give her a chance. ˝  
˝Give her a chance, what are you talking about? I told her everything and she said that it’s just a simple crush and that she doesn’t want to be with me. Who would even want to be with me except drunken girls for just a one night stand? ˝  
˝Why do you think so low of yourself? ˝ Steve asked his friend standing in the front door, not wanting him to leave.  
˝Like you would know how it feels to be like me. ˝  
Bucky’s statement brought confusion on Steve’s face.  
˝Like you? You can’t be serious. There is nothing wrong with you. ˝  
˝Other people don’t see it that way˝  
˝It doesn’t mean that you are any different just because you have a prosthetic arm.˝ Steve put his hand on Bucky’s shoulder and gently squeezed it.  
˝You never saw the faces of people when they see it. ˝  
˝You are an idiot, my friend. You are looking at the other people; you should look at Y/N. What her father and she did to make you this arm so that it would function as a real one. She never pities you; she was never disgusted by it. She loves you, the whole you. ˝  
Bucky’s eyes were getting watery and he returned to sit on the couch.  
˝She said that she doesn’t love me like that; I think that I believe her. ˝  
˝She is probably just mad at you. You were friends for so long. I don’t understand why you didn’t say anything before, you always talked about her, in high school and college. ˝  
˝I wanted to, so many times. I even planned to before the accident, but after it, I knew that there is a bigger chance of her rejecting me and then I would lose her. ˝  
Steve crossed his arms, looking at his friend breaking down.  
˝Pack your bags and go.˝  
˝What? ˝  
˝You were already planning to go with her and you told Stark that you will come.˝  
˝I can’t, she will be mad if I show up,” Bucky lowered his head.  
˝She won’t,˝

 

* * *

  
˝You look beautiful,” you said to Pepper. She was wearing her wedding dress; long sleeveless dress with lace. She looked amazing and you could’ve been happier for her and your father.  
˝I don’t look even half as good as you.˝  
˝I’m not even dressed yet,” you smiled. You loved Pepper, she was easy-going and a good listener.  
˝Is he coming? ˝  
˝Bucky? ˝  
She nodded and you continued. ˝I don’t know, we haven’t spoken since… you know.”  
˝You are being stupid. I know that I’m not your mother, but I love you as my daughter and I’m telling you that you and Bucky shouldn’t waste your precious time. You are both young, but you are getting older and I want to see you happy. The only time when you are really happy is when you are with him. So take a chance, rather destroy your friendship with trying to be with him, then letting him slip from your hands. “  
˝It’s not that easy. ˝  
˝It can’t be easier. He already told you, so now is your turn,” she said before putting her arms around you.  
˝What if he doesn’t come? ˝  
˝He is stubborn like you; he won’t give up so easily. And everything that you said, I can’t even understand why he believed you. And knowing your father, he would drag you back to America after our Honeymoon. ˝  
˝You don’t know that. And I would hide somewhere so he wouldn’t be able to find me. ˝  
˝Be reasonable Y/N, we are talking about your father. ˝  
˝Do you think that he would really drag me to the airport. ˝  
˝Honey, he would drag the plain towards you if he had to. ˝  
You both laughed at the thought of Tony dragging you back to America.

 

* * *

The ceremony was lovely. Your father’s vows made you cry and while listening to him you were glancing at Bucky. Pepper was right, he came, but you tried to avoid him until the toast.  
Your father called your name and it was your sign to hold a toast.  
You took the microphone and stood on the stage.  
˝Good evening everyone, I hope you are having fun. When my dad asked me to make a toast, I said yes and I wrote one, but I throw it away today after Pepper, my father’s beautiful wife put some sense in my brain. I decided to speak from my heart. ˝  
You looked at your father, who was smiling.  
˝Dad you are the greatest man that ever walked this planet. Everybody who knows you can say that you were sent to this earth to change it with your intelligent brain. ˝  
He laughed and you continued.  
˝Just for the record, only other people can tell you something like that and not you to yourself as you did so many times,” now guests laughed along with your father. ˝But honestly, that’s not the only thing that you are. I have lived with you since the day I was born, I never had a mother, but having you by my side I never wanted one. Everybody sees you as a genius like that’s the only thing that is great with you, but it’s not. You are the best father that I could have. You never tried to buy my love, the only thing that I ever wanted from you was your time and you always gave me that. It’s always been just the two of us. There were so many challenges while I was growing up, you didn’t know anything about raising a child, but you never gave up. Together we grow into the people we are today and I couldn’t be more proud of you. I’m hoping that one day you will be proud of me too. ˝  
You could see him whispering ˝I already am˝.  
You looked at Pepper and continue.  
˝You are marrying the best woman I have met. I never wanted a mother, I never thought that I need her, but you Pepper, it’s an honor of having you as a part of my little family,” you took a deep breath preparing yourself for what you are going to say when you get off the stage.  
˝I see how you look at each other. That love and passion, you two are meant to be together. What you two have is not often seen. It’s something that most people are dreaming about. I love you both and I’m happy for you two,” you barely hold your tears looking at your father and Pepper. You quickly walked to them almost falling into your long dark blue dress.  
˝I love you so much,” you looked at Pepper and smiled. ˝Promise me, you’ll keep him safe and tell him when he’s doing something stupid. ˝  
˝I’m not a child, you are. ˝  
You heard Pepper whisper ˝I promise.˝  
You slowly walked away, turning to the table where Bucky was sitting, but he was gone. Looking around you saw him walking to the small lake.

 

  


* * *

 

˝Why did you leave? ˝  
He didn’t say anything so you stood in front of him on the edge of the shore. He looked angry and sad.  
˝What’s wrong? ˝  
˝You were talking about love, and how they look at each other. You could’ve had that, but you throw me away. ˝ He took a step back and looked away from you.  
˝I… ˝  
˝You talked in front of the hundred people, but suddenly you can’t in front of me. I came here in hope that you will tell me that you feel the same. Was I wrong? Did you mean everything that you said back in New York? ˝  
You were looking at him, he was getting upset. The vein on his neck was pulsing and you smiled. He stopped talking. You loved him, you knew that, but the words couldn’t leave your mind. You were preparing yourself to do it and now you were standing in front of him like an idiot.  
˝Why are you smiling? What is that funny, the fact that I am madly in love with you and you don’t give a shit about it? ˝  
You quickly pulled his tie so that you could kiss him, he kissed you back immediately. The kiss was slow but at the same time full of passion. He pressed his body closer to you and you lost your balance, falling into a lake with him.  
  
˝Oh God it’s cold˝, you said finally catching your breath. You wanted to swim to the shore, but Bucky’s hand stopped you; he pulled you closer.  
˝What are you doing Buck? ˝  
˝I love you. ˝  
˝I love you too, but I want to get out of this lake. You never know what kinds of monsters are living in it. ˝  
˝You are funny,” he pulled you in for another kiss, but you quickly moved away from him swimming to the shore.  
He got out first and helped you out. Your dress was sticking to your body and you could barely walk. You looked towards the guests.  
˝We will miss the first dance,˝ you quickly said with a pout on your face.  
˝Where are you going? ˝ Bucky asked as you lifted the edge of your dress and moving towards the wedding reception.  
˝To my father’s wedding,˝ you said if it was obvious.  
˝In that dress? ˝ Bucky question while smiling at you. Not only that your dress was sticking to you, but your hair did too and you also lost one heel in the water.  
˝Do you have a better idea? ˝ you dared him.  
He smirked and picked you up, bridal style.  
˝Wait˝, you yelled.  
˝What? ˝ he stopped in his track looking at you.  
˝Promise me that I will be back on time for the cake,˝ you said while biting onto your lower lip. You wanted to eat that cake because you were the one who helped in choosing it and it was the best.  
˝When? ˝  
˝I think in two hours,˝ you said although you had no idea what time was at the moment.  
˝Well, I don’t think so,” he said before kissing you. ˝I mean we could stay here,” he teased after pulling away.  
˝No, we already wasted too much time,” you said with a smile, while he was carrying you into your father’s villa.


End file.
